If you think confidence is just about being outgoing or always looking perfect, then I’ve got news for you: that advice is completely wrong. In today’s post, I’m going to show you the TRUTH about confidence. Not only will I reveal the 5 most common confidence myths on the planet, but I’ll show you proven methods that can help you feel more confident and empowered.

#1. Confidence Myths: Be Extroverted

Back in the early days of confidence building, people believed that only extroverts could truly be confident. The idea was that if you could talk to anyone, be the center of attention, or socialize easily, you were considered confident.

At least we all thought it worked, and to some extent, it did. That’s why this approach to confidence became so popular. However, being extroverted isn’t the only way to build confidence.

The main reason? Confidence comes in many forms – introverts can be just as confident as extroverts, they just express it differently. There are other reasons too:

1. It’s about self acceptance, not performing for others.
2. Confidence is a mindset, not a personality trait.

Which means that to feel more confident, you can’t just pretend to be extroverted or force yourself to act a certain way.

What to do instead: You need to embrace your own strengths. Confidence today is about accepting who you are and being comfortable in your own skin. In fact, studies show that self acceptance can boost your confidence more than simply acting extroverted. So, if you’re looking to build your confidence, start by embracing your uniqueness, whether you’re introverted or extroverted.

#2. You Need to Look Perfect to Be Confident

Trying to chase physical perfection is a huge confidence myth. There’s so much pressure on women to look a certain way, and it can feel like if we don’t meet those standards, we’ll never feel confident. And then you wind up spending years chasing an unattainable ideal.

And if that’s not enough, here are 3 other reasons this confidence myth won’t work:

1. You’ll constantly be disappointed.
2. You’ll focus too much on appearance and forget about how amazing you are on the inside.
3. Plus, you’ll never get the real confidence you’re craving.

What to do instead: Confidence is not about perfection – it’s about embracing the beauty of imperfection. Combine this with practicing self compassion, and you’ll find confidence that truly lasts. The best part is, you’ll stop stressing over your appearance and start focusing on what really matters – your well being and personal growth.

#3. Confidence Myths: It’s Something You’re Born With

One of the most persistent confidence myth is the idea that you’re either born with it, or you’re not. So not true! Confidence is something you can build – just not the way you may think.

Building confidence takes time and effort. It’s effective when you step outside of your comfort zone and face fears gradually. For example, small wins (like speaking up in a meeting or trying something new) can have a huge impact on your confidence over time.

So you should still aim to build your confidence, but if you think it’s something you’re either born with or not, you’ll miss the opportunity to grow it.

What to do instead: Start by taking small, intentional steps every day to build your confidence, like celebrating your achievements and learning from mistakes. For example: One of my clients started by speaking up in meetings once a week and gradually became a confident leader at work.

#4. You Only Need to Fake it Until You Make It

The truth? Faking it won’t cut it for true confidence. Even though you may look confident on the outside, if you’re not working on your mindset and self belief, that confidence will be short lived.

To really get the results you want, you should be actively cultivating self trust and believing in your worth. The National Library of Medicine even states that “Self affirmation activates brain systems associated with self related processing and reward and is reinforced by future orientation.” Self affirmation is a crucial step in truly building long lasting confidence.

What to do instead: Focus on genuine self development and internal growth. A simple step you can take today is to start a journal with daily affirmations that boost your confidence. By doing this consistently, you’ll begin to see real, lasting changes in your confidence levels.

Wrapping Up Confidence Myths

There you have it: 4 confidence myths. As you saw, confidence isn’t about pretending to be someone you’re not or meeting unrealistic standards. Today, it’s more about embracing your authentic self. Not trying to fit into a mold. I hope this post has helped you steer clear of misleading information so you can feel confident in who you truly are.

Now, over to you. Which of these confidence myths did you find most surprising? Drop a comment below or send me a message on Instagram or at photographybyambercarl@gmail.com – I’d love to hear your thoughts! If you’d like to dive deeper check out my blog post: Why I Don’t Diet Anymore And What I Do Instead To Feel Confident And Beautiful.

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May 2025 – Hawaii Couples Retreat – 1 spot left!

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